Making Daily Choices to Love Your Spouse


Theresa had a stroke 18 years ago. She lost control over her hands. Which means for all these years she’s struggled to do simple things in life, like styling her own hair. That’s why when she goes to the beauty salon, she leaves with a smile. She feels beautiful.

The trouble is, as soon as she washes her hair it falls flat, and she can’t get it to look the way her stylist does. Which means, until her next hair appointment comes around, Theresa doesn’t smile as much.

Andrew, Theresa’s husband for nearly 45 years, wants her to feel great about her hair every day. So, Andrew went to his wife’s salon and asked for guidance. Theresa’s hairstylist pointed out the hair products he needed to recreate his wife’s look at home and then taught him how to use them. Andrew spent hours practicing with a brush, a curling iron, and hair spray. He’s not ready to declare himself a master hair stylist, but he sure enjoys the smile he sees on Theresa’s face when he does her hair.

Expressions of love like Andrew’s inspire me. You don’t hear about them very often, sadly. Our culture’s definition of love often focuses on what’s good for me instead of what’s good for my spouse. True love takes grit and sacrifice.

It also takes humility. Grand gestures of love and romance have their place in marriage, but it’s the little choices you and I make every day that make a good marriage great and breathe new life into relationships that are struggling.

On Focus on the Family with Jim Daly, I’m talking with Ron and Deb DeArmond about intentionally loving your spouse through commitment, self-sacrifice, and loving service. Ron and Deb serve as Associate Pastors of Adult Ministry at Catch the Fire in Dallas, Texas and have been married over 40 years.

Listen to our full conversation on your local radio station, online, on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or listen on our free phone app.

Deb’s book I Choose You Today: 31 Choices to Make Love Last is available for a gift of any amount. Give us a call at 1-800-A-FAMILY (232-6459) or click here for more information.



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